7 Signs Your Anxiety is Attached to Abandonment
Abandonment is one of the biggest triggers for the patterned stress response we feel with anxiety.
I was abandoned by my father as a child. Even though I don’t have any memories of him, there were a number of behaviours that formed part of my personality back then, all in an attempt to keep the feeling of abandonment hidden from my awareness. These patterns would continue for most of my childhood and adult life.
It’s taken almost 30 years for me to become aware of it and I’m now deep into healing my inner child.
One of the biggest breakthroughs I’ve had has been with my relationship around money. I fed a 15 year gambling addiction because I didn’t feel I was worthy of having money. As easy at it came to me it disappeared. Spending or investing money on myself was the last thing I did. It wasn’t until this year when I struggled to put a value my coaching services that I realised this was all tied to trauma around abandonment.
If you are someone who has experienced abandonment, this message is for you:
There’s nothing you need to prove about yourself. You are already loveable and individually unique. You have everything you need inside of you. Just know that you are powerful and worthy of experiencing a life you truly desire. And most importantly,
YOU ARE NEVER ALONE.
Here are 7 signs your anxiety is attached to abandonment:
You don’t put yourself first
You feel the need to please others and struggle to say no, often at the expense of taking time for yourself.
You seek validation
You feel the need to ask family, friends, and/or your partner for their opinion before you make a decision or share something you’ve created with the world.
You must always explain yourself
You feel the need to explain yourself to people who disagree with and/or don’t understand you.
You repeatedly apologise
You often feel the need to apologise to others. whether you are taking up someones space or time, you feel like you are being a burden to them.
You struggle with expression
whether it’s sharing on social media or within your relationships, you struggle to express your feelings and true self, and you worry about being misunderstood or rejected.
You aren’t open to receiving
You don’t give back to yourself, and often struggle to reach out for help, or accept help when it’s on offer.
You feel like it’s never enough
It doesn’t matter how much you accomplish, it never seems to be enough for you, so you chase the next big thing and realise nothing external will ever make you feel whole.
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